Ewolewoo!!

I don’t know if the NNPC GMD and the minister of state for petroleum,  Emmanuel Ibe Kachukwu, still understands that he has changed job. If he doesn’t know, people close to him should remind him that this is no Exxon-Mobil job. This is a much general job where he wouldn’t only deal with office grammar but he would have to also deal with gutter grammar. In this job he is in, the propensity for error is so large that he could be thrown into the lagoon without knowing it.

The other day he was telling Nigerians that he and NNPC have done so much. He even opined that we should  clap for them because we could see petrol despite all the “enormous constraints”.  He further said he wasn’t a magician (which he has since apologised for). Now, he is talking about consultants and also talking up on the dilapidated refineries.  He has started lamenting that the refineries haven’t had real turn-around maintenance for a long time. He has now given a firm date of 7^th of April 2016 as the day that things would change as it concerns availability of petrol. Someone should inform Kachukwu that he is talking too much.

Kachukwu has a problem. The problem is NNPC.  He  should also realise that NNPC is no Exxon Mobil. In Exxon Mobil, you have lots of protocols where problems can easily be identified and solved. You have serious internal controls where the faults can be located and proper resources are channelled to isolate the faults. In a company like Exxon, you cannot have multiple accounts controlled by different entities. Auditing of Exxon accounts can easily be managed and anyone with infractions is dealt with without any form of contrived complications. That is Exxon mobil. NNPC is a different ball game entirely.

NNPC as we speak cannot tell anyone what exactly is going on with the refineries she is managing, not even Kachukwu. Forget the grammar. No one in NNPC would detail out the problems in the refineries which is strange. They’ve got various engineering teams in NNPC but no one would tell you anything. Yet this is a public company. NNPC is shamelessly importing almost 100% of local petrol needs after wholesome failure in managing refineries. To make matters worse, no one has been prosecuted in that organization for what everyone knows is obvious rape of the country’s resources.

If you ask Exxon Mobil to provide their audited accounts reports for the last 7 years, you know who to meet. In NNPC’s case, who do you meet? Anyone you ask is always looking sideways. This is the organization kachukwu wants us to believe would provide petrol on 6^th of April. I just hope he believes himself because Nigerians don’t.

You hear of pipes being vandalised when petrol is flowing. They are vandalised at the specific time there is discharge through the pipes. When this is done, no one in NNPC knows. Can you imagine that? To make it funnier, no one in NNPC is penalised and persecuted. Sometimes you would just hear of tepid transfers that make no sense.  My people, the best place to work is NNPC I tell you.

Someone should inform Kachukwu that he should understand that  NNPC works in a way that defiles the kind of corporate logic he is used to. He should stop saying things that makes sense to only himself as Nigerians see such talk as imbecilic rants. If he cannot solve the internal cult of criminality in NNPC then he should stop making promises. If he still looks at NNPC experience as an extension of his Exxon Mobil career, then he should humbly ask to retire to his Lagos mansion and face his private world where his words is law.

For now, he is not performing….Ewolewoo!!